The Panic Ensues

Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff made comments regarding our national security against terror threats and although he had no evidence to raise threat levels, he chose to make these remarks on a "gut feeling". Yes, that's right. A "gut feeling".

"I believe we are entering a period this summer of increased risk. Summertime seems to be appealing to them," he said of al-Qaeda. "We do worry that they are rebuilding their activities." Why Michael? Is it the heat? Does summer remind them of home and therefore they feel more comfortable? What an idiot.

I have a gut geeling that Michael Chertoff is a moron. Wait, that's not a good comparison because I've probably gathered more evidence that he is a moron than he has gathered on terror threats.

House Homeland Security Committee Chairman Bennie Thompson is questioning Michael Chertoff's "gut feeling"... Thompson has written to the secretary asking him to explain his feeling. The Mississippi Democrat asked what color code is associated with a "gut feeling" about the terror threat and what cities should be working their police on double shifts as a result.

The White House responded to Chertoff's gut feeling: "There continues to be no credible intelligence to suggest that there is an imminent threat to the homeland," said Tony Fratto, deputy press secretary at the White House, a day after Chertoff made his remarks to the Tribune's editorial board.

As far as the Crypt Keeper worrying about Al-Qaeda rebuilding their activities, that's a legit concern. But the problem is that he shouldn't worry about the "rebuilding" phase because according to a U.S. intelligence report, Al-Qaeda is at its greatest strength since it was expelled from Afghanistan after the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks. The intelligence assessment is titled "Al-Qaeda Better Positioned to Strike the West." Another home run for the Bush Administration... I wonder what team they're playing for.

As for Press Secretary Tony Snow, a little thing like terminal cancer isn't stopping him from giving his standard, smart-aleck answers to the Washington Press Corps. When asked of Chertoff's gut feeling, Snow said, "I don't want to try to get into gastrointestinal descriptions." Oh, ho-ho, ho, Tony! You're such a card.

But it looks like the fear mongering has already started to work. A flight from Los Angeles to London was diverted to New York early Thursday because of what officials said may have been unfounded fears of a security breach. The fears were unfounded because the passenger in question was actually an employee traveling in a private capacity. Chertoff said he had gotten information from airline representatives. "It may very well turn out that this is nothing more than a misunderstanding with an employee."

Carrying 230 passengers, the flight landed at JFK at about 3:30 a.m... The plane was searched and nothing suspicious was found, according to American Airlines spokeswoman Sonja Whitemon. The passengers onboard had to be re-screened and put on new planes because [the] original was canceled due to flight crew time regulations. American Airlines said the passengers will start boarding alternate flights starting at 8:30 a.m.

Heckuva job, Crypt Keeper. Why does everything these people touch turn to shit?

If you were in an Al-Qaeda cell, wouldn't you just be driving by now?