McCain's VP Choice: Complete Pander

In a feeble attempt to lure disgruntled Hillary female supporters, the mythical PUMAs, conservatives and the NRA crowd in one fell swoop, the Maverick has decided that the person best suited to be his running mate on the Republican ticket is Alaska Governor Sarah Palin. I'll give you a minute to pick your jaw up off the floor... [instrumental of "Girl from Ipanema"]

McCain made this choice after a constant barrage of criticism regarding Barack Obama's "inexperience." What, you might ask, qualifies Palin to be the second in line to the Presidency should something befall Senator McCain (like his face falling off from the melanoma) if he ascended to the Oval Office? Well let's take a look at her resumé.

1984 - Miss Wasilla
1984 - Miss Alaska pageant runner up (disqualified for wearing a two piece bathing suit)
Bachelor's Degree in Journalism from University of Idaho
1992 through 1996 - City Council, Wasilla, Alaska
2002 - Mayor, Wasilla, Alaska (Population 5,470)
2002 - Unsucessful bid for Lieutenant Governor of Alaska
2006 to present - Governor of Alaska
She loves moose stew and mooseburgers.

...Okay. Great choice, McCain.

She's Pro-Life, opposes same-sex marriage, is in favor of drilling in ANWR, has a 100% approval rating from the NRA... What am I missing?

Do they think that Biden will go easy on her during their debate?

Here's the McCain campaign's official statement.

U.S. Senator John McCain today announced that he has selected Alaska Governor Sarah Palin to be his running mate and to serve as his vice president.

Governor Palin is a tough executive who has demonstrated during her time in office that she is ready to be president. She has brought Republicans and Democrats together within her Administration and has a record of delivering on the change and reform that we need in Washington.

Governor Palin has challenged the influence of the big oil companies while fighting for the development of new energy resources. She leads a state that matters to every one of us -- Alaska has significant energy resources and she has been a leader in the fight to make America energy independent.

In Alaska, Governor Palin challenged a corrupt system and passed a landmark ethics reform bill. She has actually used her veto and cut budgetary spending. She put a stop to the "bridge to nowhere" that would have cost taxpayers $400 million dollars.

As the head of Alaska's National Guard and as the mother of a soldier herself, Governor Palin understands what it takes to lead our nation and she understands the importance of supporting our troops.

Governor Palin has the record of reform and bipartisanship that others can only speak of. Her experience in shaking up the status quo is exactly what is needed in Washington today.

As for the Democratic reaction, this one's my favorite so far:

Chuck Schumer: "After the great success of the Democratic convention, the choice of Sarah Palin is surely a Hail Mary pass... Certainly the choice of Palin puts to rest any argument about inexperience on the Democratic team and while Palin is a fine person, her lack of experience makes the thought of her assuming the presidency troubling. I particularly look forward to the Biden-Palin debate in Missouri."

Although I'll never forgive Schumer for the Mukasey fuck up, it's still a good quote. You gotta scratch your head and wonder what (or if) the McCain campaign is thinking.

More on Palin here and here.

Also read Dingeldein and Cesca.