Meet the New House...

... same as the old House.

So as expected, despite his attempts at self sabotage by walking away from negotiation after negotiation,  pouting during a meeting with leaders after his failed Plan B stunt, telling Sen. Harry Reid to go fuck himself and blowing off the Sandy Relief Aid bill incurring the wrath of some of his own congressional "allies," including one particular large Republican Governor, John Boehner was re-elected as Speaker of the House with 220 votes.

The first filed bill came from Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minnesota, what the fuck are you thinking?!) to... wait for it... repeal Obamacare. You know, because the first 33 votes worked so well.

The sound you hear is that of my forehead repeatedly banging into my keyboard.

Weeper of the House!

Okay, I have to ask. What's with that gavel? Is he compensating for something else? For Christ's sake, buy a Porshe!

GOP Keynote Speaker: Noun-Verb-9/11-Giuliani

Yeth, former New York Thity Mayor and current athwipe Rudy Giuliani hath been chothen ath the keynote thpeaker for the Republican National Convention in Minneapolith nexth month.

Here'th a brief preview:

"9/11 9/11 9/11 Terroriths 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 Terrorithm 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 Hate uth for our freedomth 9/11 9/11 9/11 Maverick will catch Othama bin Laden 9/11 9/11 Are you thcared yet? 9/11 9/11 9/11 terroriths 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 Ithlamic Exthtremiths 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 terrorithm 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11 9/11!"