The Biggest Loser

Yeah, I know "The Biggest Loser" is a reality show weight lost contest and that Donald Trump's faux reality show is called "The Apprentice" or "Celebrity Apprentice," but it really should be changed, because truly, the only loser bigger than Trump could be Mitt Romney for actually accepting his endorsement today in Sin City.

LAS VEGAS - Donald Trump endorsed Mitt Romney here Thursday afternoon in a joint appearance that lasted less than seven minutes and included no questions.

The two men stood behind a lectern emblazoned with a gold “Trump” plaque (a large Romney sign hung off to the side, largely out of the TV shots), and the endorsement came amid several impromptu news conferences that Mr. Trump organized for himself.

It seems as though The Donald can't go less than three weeks without looking for headlines like his like depended on it; like the blood in his veins would dry up if he gave up his media whorishness.

It all started yesterday when Trump made a statement on his favorite medium, Twitter:

I will be making a major announcement today at 12:30 pm PST at Trump International Hotel & Tower, Las Vegas, Nevada. The announcement will pertain to the Presidential race. All media welcome.

All media welcome?! Say it ain't so!

At no point in my though process did the idea of Trump announcing an independent run come to mind. My initial thought was that he was going to endorse Romney but was too chickenshit take the lead and do it earlier because his ego wouldn't be able to handle betting on the wrong horse. He waited until after the Florida primary, saw that Newt Gingrich was dead in the water and then thought he'd make a grand announcement and take credit for being a king maker once the odds-on favorite eventually won the nomination.

Then there was rumor that Trump was to endorse Newt Gingrich, and it got me to thinking that perhaps his ego was so bruised after Newt was the only candidate to accept an invitation to the ill-fated Trump debate, that he'd back the one person who was loyal to him. But is loyalty in Trump's repertoire? That rumor quickly faded and so I was left with the chickenshit theory, which happened to be the correct one.

How ironic that the man who made "You're fired" his catchphrase endorsed the man who said he likes "being able to fire people"? The one saving grace in the whole fiasco was that on Groundhog Day, Trump decided to make the Romney endorsement himself instead of letting the groundhog that lives on his head do it.

Trump Pulls Out of Debate

Badgerhead Donald Trump has decided that he's not going to moderate the Newsmax debate. His excuse? He doesn't want to "give up his right to run as an independent candidate" which we all know is bullshit otherwise he wouldn't have agreed to it in the first place.

Face it, Republicans: this thing was a joke from the beginning and why have a debate when no one is showing up? The only Trump whores were front runners Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum (who really has nothing to lose) and The Donald didn't want to be in a position of not being able to fire anyone. You can't use your tag line if there's no one in the room.

Texas Tech (still) sux

posted by Armadillo Joe

And Matt Yglesias agrees with me.

If this keeps up...

posted by Armadillo Joe

...I'm going to stop telling people where I went to college.

First it was chair-flinger Bobby Knight. When Indiana fired him, I rejoiced that the S.O.B. was on the street. I thought - "Good. No college would touch that guy. I'm glad he's jobless." Then my alma mater gave him a job.

Now, Gonzo found a job when no one else would take him. Guess where?

...(sigh)...

Go Tech!