Saturday, April 25, 2009

Red State: Waterboarding = High School Swim Team Practice

Silly me! Of course being on the high school swim team is exactly like waterboarding! Those long practices were "torturous"! Why didn't I see this to begin with?

As a matter of fact, I do recall seeing pictures of Olympic Gold Medalist Michael Phelps being strapped down onto an inclined board with his feet higher than his head, while his swimming coaches blinded him, stuffed a rag down his throat and poared water onto his face, into his nose and onto the rag which would then seep into his throat as part of his training regimen. And what does he have to show for it? 14 GOLD MEDALS, BABY! (Two bronze medals too, but that's because he wasn't waterboarded enough, that pussy.)

No one remembers those pictures though. All we get is the bong hit photo - fucking LIBERAL MEDIA!

Oh, the other difference between waterboarding and the swim team? Waterboarding is torture... and you can always quit the swim team.

(H/T Bob Cesca)

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